"I'm not very good at resting," she admits with a sigh. "I had everything I wanted for them, didn't have to keep up with the life I'd been leading separate from them, but I did anyway. It's... why I ended up here. I didn't want to rest, to look at myself and what I really needed - let alone wanted - from life. So I stuck to the streets, taking less than reputable jobs doing things I was good at, to keep myself distracted. I was out on a job when I ran into the Nexus." The tea cup in front of her is turning out to be very interesting. There's so much running through her mind and she doesn't want Viatorus to think any of the pent up anger she feels is directed at him.

"It was a stupid thing to do. I had accepted the fate of living alone years before, but when faced with actually living that life, I decided to ignore the decision and continue doing unnecessary things. Now I have no idea if all the plans I laid out worked or if the family is even faring well." Another sigh as she shakes her head in shame. "Is my family financially stable? Are all those workers I trained doing their jobs so my parents don't have to? Is my scholar brother still studying? Is my little sister getting the absolute best care possible? What of my brother and his wife - has my new niece or nephew been born? Are their other children doing well?" Her hands grip the fabric of her pants tightly. "So many questions and I'll have none of them answered. Not here. And I... have to learn to live with that."

It's not Viatorus' fault that she's still here. It's not Schön's fault and it's not Naugus' fault. It is hers and hers alone. She only hope he sees it that way, too, because the last thing she wants is him feeling responsible for something she did to herself.