rogueinladysclothing | Settling debts [Tagging Samus]

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Settling debts [Tagging Samus]

There's something satisfying about the morning after a job well done that always leaves a small spring in Amelia's step. Having spent most of the previous day in bed certainly helped to that end as well, even if the question she later posed in the Forum did not. After interrupting their previous celebratory breakfast for one more last minute heist, Amelia is determined to make sure the only thing that interrupts their enjoyment of the food is making sure Samus gets her fair share for her part in the heists.

Despite her rather spectacular fight with Verity the previous afternoon and the lack of sleep that followed, Amelia is the first to arrive at the Stellar Harp that morning. She chooses a table in the back, away from where prying eyes could look over the many files she brought with her, and orders a cup of coffee for herself and a cup of akh for Samus. Feeling peckish, she also orders a few slices of wheat toast and an assortment of jellies to nibble on until the hunter arrives. No point in holding off completely when she missed almost every meal yesterday. She only hopes the conversation will remain on topic so she wants to eat breakfast later.

Her nose is in the file on the Gugghenheim when Samus arrives. She figures they can start with the first heist and make their way through the list in figuring out what the hunter would like to take home with her.

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*When Samus arrives, her expression is closed, guarded. She claims a seat without waiting for an invitation.*

I had an interesting conversation with Verity. Care to explain?

...so much for her appetite.

She carefully sets the file back into her messenger bag before looking up at Samus. It seems as if she wants to keep her expression schooled and calm, but there's a fleeting terror settled into her eyes. Her shoulders give a nonchalant shrug, but the way they shake gives her away.

"We fought. What more is there to say?"

Bad decisions and lies are part of her daily routine. Sorry, Samus.

I'm giving you a chance to explain your perspective. I've heard Verity's side, and I've heard the general rumors. If you'd like to weigh in, this would be the time.

*Samus' gaze and tone are both steady. She doesn't glare or raise her voice, but she doesn't seem pleased.*

Samus can't know for sure if Amelia's telling the truth, but this isn't the kind of fight that can be so easily swept under the rug. She's had fights with someone else as hot headed as herself before, but there was never any resolution. And now he was gone, and Amelia is unlikely to ever see him again and it hurts. She could run from this, ask Schön to hide her somewhere, but what then? She'll never get home if that happens.

Amelia's eyes settle on the now forgotten plate of toast. Her stomach sinks to the soles of her feet and her heart races. That urge to run again is high, but how far could she get before the hunter caught her? Not far enough.

"On the Forum yesterday, I asked how I could make someone believe my apology is sincere. Verity turned up. We... had words over her advice. She tried to turn away and I... I got so angry at her that I..." She closes her eyes tightly, the gloss that had covered her eyes becoming tears. "I yelled at her. I blamed her for what I had done. And then I... I threw the coffee she'd gotten for me at her feet. I didn't hit her, and I never meant to, but I... For all the times I've ever been angry at someone I've never done that when I wasn't actively battling someone. Then Jim Kirk swept her away and all these... these thoughts and feelings from back in my world flooded me and I ran. I lost myself in the Parklands until my legs couldn't hold me up anymore. And then I forced myself back up and went... I went..."

The word "home" doesn't fit here. It never will. Amelia's hands fly to her face as she tries to cover the tears running down her cheeks suddenly. It hurts to breath. The world is spinning around her. The roof of her mouth strains against movement to keep from making a sound. This pain... it's not like anything she's ever felt before.

How she wishes she weren't in public right now.

*Samus listens in stoic silence. If she's moved by the tears, it doesn't show. She doesn't raise her voice, or sharpen her tone, but the quiet, neutral voice she employs may be more terrible for its calm.*

You've asked for help from Verity several times, and each time she's given it. My help, on this project, was help that Verity gave you, because she called me and vouched for you. Is this how you treat the people who help you, Amelia?

Her whole body trembles as she speaks, her hands parting just enough for her voice to sneak through and reach Samus' ears.

"Yes." No more excuses. No more lies. For once, they won't serve her here.

For once, she'll openly admit her terrible nature to someone who doesn't already know it. Her voice is calm, too calm, as she continues. Her pace is slow, methodical, almost as if she's memorized what she has to say.

"I am not a nice person. Not generally, at least. Or, rather... not in earnest. I am kind to my family because they are my family and that is what they deserve, even if they annoy me and do things that make me want to tear my hair out. I am kind to my customers, because I need their continued patronage to support myself and my family. However, no other person can say that I am generally a kind person. I yell orders at my shop hands and warehouse workers. I physically push the limits of my traveling companions. I lie. I cheat people when making deals. I steal. I fight. And when I need to, I kill."

She slowly removes her hands and looks up at Samus, her hazel eyes puffy and red. Tears have stained her cheeks, but there is no apology there. This is who she is, who she has made herself to be. Even if it, too, is a lie, it's the one lie she doesn't know she's telling, because the only victim of it is herself.

Yelling at Verity was something you needed to do?

*A brow rises into a skeptical arch.*

Do you have any idea what she's going through right now?

"No, I didn't need to do that, but I did it anyway, because that's what I do. I don't think about the consequences, I just do whatever feels right at the time." Her eyes settle on the table slowly. "I was upset and I yell at people when I get upset. Verity didn't need that, but I did it anyway." Old habits are hard to break.

She thinks carefully before speaking again. "I know what she's going through right now, but I can't possibly relate. My world is still there, somewhere, unreachable but alive. Verity... she has the opposite problem. Her world is there, alive, thriving, but soon... soon it won't be. I can't even begin to fathom that."

*It's an admission, but not an apology. Not that Samus is the one she owes one to, anyway.*

That's right.

*She lets those words hang for a moment, then moves on.*

We were meant to be discussing my price for helping you, so here it is: first, you're going to give me back the low-pro armor I gave you; and second, you're not going to call me for another job again.

Oh good, negotiations. Amelia can handle those.

"Of course. I don't deserve either." Perhaps a bit surprisingly, she pulls the armor from the messenger back and slides it across the table to Samus. After quickly waving off the approaching waiter, she looks in Samus' direction. Her eyes don't settle on the hunter's, but rather on her right ear. Someone like Samus will likely understand she's trying to give the illusion of meeting her gaze while not actually doing it, but Amelia knows she can't hide her face forever.

"What else?" She's leaving the table completely open here. Were this a negotiation with anyone else, she'd have countered and fought to keep the armor. And if this had happened back home, she would never do such a thing.

Her stomach twists at the thought and she suddenly has to fight to keep her breathing even.

That's it.

*She takes the armor off the table, her gaze never wavering from Amelia.*

You got a bargain.

"No."

And suddenly, it's as if she's not herself.

"Please, take something else. Anything else. I can't... I can't let it go at that. I..." I think you deserve more for your work. I think it's only fair to get something more than just the armor back. I think it's best if you take something for your time.

"...don't deserve the better end of the bargain."

You've already lost my respect, Amelia. Of what you still have, there's nothing I want.

"...I see."

She's been told by many people that they hate her, that she's a scheming bitch, that she deserves all the nightmares coming to her in the afterlife.

Not one person has ever hurt her as deeply as Samus just did.

"Well, if... if there's nothing else you want, then, I should be going." Her movements are fluid as she stands, but her lips and hands are trembling. A few coins are laid out on the table before she turns to Samus and inclines her head and shoulders in a slight bow.

"I promise to stay out of contact and as far out of your life as possible, if that's what you wish." I'm used to being alone anyway. "My... address remains the same if you ever feel the need to..." yell at me, scream at me, hit me, put me in my place "to acquire the services of someone who has contracted themselves to Schön."

She takes a few steps past Samus and then stops. With one last look over her shoulder, she says softly, "I'm sorry. I never deserved your help and my abuse of it only doubles the offense. I don't deserve forgiveness, so I beg you not to find any for me. I..." No. No more. She has no reason to listen anyway. "I'm sorry."

Her footsteps take her out of the Harp and into a nearby alley, one that is only noticed when someone is looking for it. The inn is too far away and she still needs to meet with Schön. The alley is a fine place to get out all of her tears and regain her composure, even if the latter ends up being another lie.

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Settling debts [Tagging Samus]

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